1. The feeling that I never want to get out of bed again. Not in that nice ‘it’s cold out there and I’m all snuggly’ way but in a ‘I want the world to go away and someone put a cork in that baby’ way.

2. Lack of the ability to concentrate. I can’t write more than a sentence or two, I can’t read more than a page, I can’t finish anything, I can barely manage to watch a whole TV programme. It’s frustrating.

3. Loss of the desire to play with the kids. Some days I just haven’t got the energy, patience, want or urge to sit down and play with the babies. So instead I sit and beat myself up about it whilst they amuse themselves/each other.

4. Lack of emotion. Some days I don’t feel down. Or up. I just feel nothingy. And it’s hideous – I’m not excited about anything, I’m not angry with anything, I’m not even bored – I’m just ‘meh’.

5. Not knowing any answers. I hate not being able to give a reason when someone says ‘why are you miserable?’ But I can’t. If I knew I’d do something about it. Be warned – asking me ‘why’ is likely to make me cry on you.

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