Blog Hop · Just For Fun

Guardian Q&A: Knob or not?

I begged and pleaded have been tagged by the lovely Heather over at SAHMLovingIt  and then I got tagged by Beth at Bethan-No-Y (because I laughed at her) in the Guardian Weekend meme that’s going round.

I have to answer a selection of Q and As originally purloined (do you know how much I wanted to spell that ‘Purrloin’? I have clearly been playing Pokémon far too much on the DS) from The Guardian Weekend magazine so that I can then be categorised into either the ‘yeah you seem like a nice person, I’d go for a pint with you’ group or the ‘Christ what a KNOB! LISTEN TO YOURSELF!’ group.

I suspect I might just be a ‘Oh what a dull, normal person (who plays too much Pokémon)’ group member.

Here we go:

Which living person do you most admire, and why?

I suspect this is a very common answer but hey. My Mum. She’s raised me and my older siblings to be fairly respectable, polite adults. She’s a fabulous Nannan to her three grandchildren. She’s always there when you need a shoulder to cry on/an ear to bash about something/a giggle. She’s always been my Mummy but now I’m older she’s turned into my best friend as well and I’d like to think that Tori & Arthur will be able to say the same about me when they grow up. If they do I’m fairly sure it will mostly be down to my Mum because I’ve learned it all from her 🙂

When were you happiest?

Why the past tense? Now. Right now. With my two babies and Sy and the rest of my family around me. I’m in a happy place at the moment and I love it!

What was your most embarrassing moment?

You want me to choose just one??! Er. Having to wear a silly birthday cake hat in a really posh restaurant whilst everyone sang Happy Birthday at me on my 20th was fairly humiliating. There’s a picture somewhere of me looking like a strawberry wearing a cake, I will go find it for you…

 Aside from property, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought? 

Um. Now I think about it, I think the double buggy I bought for the smalls gets that title. Though I did have a £190 government pregnancy grant thing which covered most of it. But still, it was £250. Other than that it’d be some computer component or other probably. (Having never bought a car or anything £250 on one thing feels like a lot to me…)

What is your most treasured possession?

My photographs, my cuddly rabbit Pinky and my books.

Where would you like to live?

Bath. Bath Bath Bath Bath Bath Bath. Or North Yorkshire.

What’s your favourite smell?

Newborn Baby. You know, when they’re all soft and warm and milky smelling… (not when they’re all pukey/just filled their nappy)

Who would play you in the film of your life?

Er. I really have no idea. I once got told I looked like Katie Holmes so maybe her? (I’m not entirely sure if the person that said that had ever really looked at a picture of Katie Holmes and me side-by-side but she’s hot so I won’t question…)

What is your favourite book?

I have several but the top 3 usually (it does vary depending on my mood) consists of I, Houdini by Lynne Reid-Banks, Fire by Kristin Cashore and Dear Nobody by Berlie Doherty – all of which are YA novels. I do read grown-up books too, honest!

What is your most unappealing habit?

My inability to not squeeze spots when they emerge is pretty foul. I do try to leave them alone. I almost always fail.

What would be your fancy dress costume of choice? 

A Mord-Sith red leather all-in-one thing would be awesome. So long as I could squeeze my wibbly-post-baby bits in and smooth them out somehow. Else it’d just be hideous. (Mord-Sith are characters in Terry Goodkind’s Sword Of Truth epic fantasy novel series by the way. Think very confident, very deadly women in red leather and you’re basically there. Red leather because it doesn’t show the blood. Obviously.)

What is your earliest memory?

One of them is being on a mini ferris wheel at Lego Land in Copenhagen all by myself. I felt really grown up. It was our last holiday before we moved back to England I think.

What is your guiltiest pleasure?

Some of the 1990’s cheesiest pop groups and artists. When I know no-one is going to turn up and interrupt I love nothing more than to blast out S Club 7, the Spice Girls, Westlife and Will Young whilst I potter round the house. I know. I’ll be leaving now…

What do you owe your parents?

More than I could ever repay. Oh, and £60 for the hotel deposit for the wedding in May…

To whom would you most like to say sorry, and why?

To Sy for being a complete psychopath sometimes. And also for being an utterly useless housewife *surveys surrounding mess*

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

What? Marzipan and most four legged animals. Who? Sy 🙂

What does love feel like?

Holding hands with somebody and jumping off a very tall bridge with your eyes closed.

 What was the best kiss of your life? 

The one when Sy & I were walking back to my parents and the moon was out and there was nothing but us, the fields and moonlight. It was a little chilly but that kiss made me warm all through. *mush* *passes bucket for everyone else to vomit in*

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

‘(Go) On there’ ‘Oh no’ ‘uh oh’ ‘gone now’ (All of which are also Tori’s most overused phrases…) and ‘No’ ‘Bollocks’ ‘awsome’ and ‘Yay!’

What is the worst job you’ve done?

Waitressing for a caterer. There was never enough of us for the amount of people we were serving, we never knew what we were meant to be doing, we were regularly in an over-filled marquee in a field about as flat as a cobbled street and my boss was grouchy (to put it politely).

If you could edit your past, what would you change?

I’d have done Geography A-Level instead of Chemistry and wouldn’t have dropped Physics (I’d probably have failed it at the end of it but I do wish I had at least tried to carry it on after AS-Level)

What is the closest you’ve come to death?

I almost got struck by lightning in my parent’s back garden once. I went outside to watch the storm (yes, I am aware that this is not wildly intelligent) and was happily stood there when the air went all funny. I could taste electricity and all the hairs on my arms stood up. Then lightning hit the big metal box thing on the side of the telegraph pole (?) in the corner of the garden (which was all of about 7 foot away), sparks landed at my feet, I hit the ground instinctively then bolted for the back door. It’s the fastest I have ever moved.

My parents thought it was hilariously funny. They were stood in the kitchen watching and telling my sister all about it on the phone.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

Tori & Arthur

When did you last cry, and why?

Saturday because I was having a really really bad day and Sy spoke to me. That was all it took. He probably didn’t even say anything horrible (I can’t even remember), I just burst into tears and cried on him.

How do you relax?

I blog, play on a variety of games consoles (not all at once), read or cross-stitch. I used to volunteer dog-walk but now I live too far away from the rescue centre 😦

What single thing would improve the quality of your life?

Just to give the answer everyone else probably does – A decent lottery win. Wouldn’t have to be millions, just enough to make it so we don’t have to worry about the gas bill in Winter and take the kids to the zoo without having to save up the train fare specially (i.e. enough to buy a car/driving lessons).

What is the most important lesson life has taught you?

Even if you think you can’t carry on – you can. Always. You just need to look at the bigger picture and remember what’s actually important.

Also life has taught me that orange and chocolate do not marry together happily in any situation. It is ALWAYS disgusting.

So – am I a knob or not? You decide!

I now pass the honour of answering this marvellous Q&A session to:




…though knowing my luck they’ve already done it without my noticing…

*Edit I tag Hollie too – because her blog is new and it’s a good ‘getting to know you’ exercise!

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